Kinship caregivers have various emotions they may have to contend with, once the decision is made to take a child(ren) into their homes. Many of these feelings are natural, and will go away over time. The important point is to not let these feelings destroy the relationship between the child and his/her parent(s), and the relationship between the kinship caregiver and the parent(s):

Anger
Feelings of anger towards the parents of the children you have taken into your home are common. Many caregivers are angry at having to readjust their home and lifestyle to accommodate a child, or a number of children.

Guilt
Some caregivers, specifically grandparents, may question their parenting style and decision-making, and feel guilt that they have somehow failed their child, because their child is unable to parent his/her own child. Caregivers should be secure in their knowledge that they did the best parenting job they could, and not blame themselves for what their children do as adults.

Loyalty
Kinship caregivers may have loyalty issues when it comes to the child in their care, and that child’s parent(s). Although caregivers know that they have to care for and protect the child in their care, caregivers, especially grandparents, may still feel that they are being disloyal to the child’s parent(s).

Resentment
Some caregivers do have feelings of resentment at having to parent all over again, and again, this is a natural feeling. The key is to not let this resentment hinder the parent-child relationship, which could result in reunification, at a later time.

Fear
Some kinship caregivers do have fears of parenting, especially if they have never parented a child before, or if they have not parented a child since their own children were young. Times are different, and even the children of today are different, so these feelings are natural. Kinship caregivers also face the fear of uncertainty of the future, especially concerning financial matters.

In order to address some of these issues, it is recommended that kinship caregivers locate supportive services that can provide support and assistance, specific to the child’s and the caregiver’s needs. This may include counseling or support groups.

Other Important Information:
Education Opportunities